Ten Years

Ten years ago today…wow.  Ten years ago on this day I was getting my hair done…putting on my dress and waiting with a pit of excitement and nerves in my stomach.  I was looking at the flowers on the table you sent me.  Applying my 5th application of lip gloss.  Waiting for someone to tell me…it's time.  Waiting for my big walk down the aisle. To you. To say my vows.  To become husband and wife.  To start a new chapter in our life together.  I had no idea what the future held.  But I couldn't wait!

We were just 22.  Babies really.  Of course it didn't feel like it then.  It felt like we were full grown adults…who had a plan and life figured out.  For the most part, I think we were and did.  We knew we wanted to be married.  We knew Jeremy was going to get his Civil Engineering Degree and I'd work at Boeing and continue working on my degree.  We knew we wanted to take some trips, own a house verses rent and we had already gone through the painstaking process of purchasing our first house.  We also knew we enjoyed the process of updating said house and taking care of it and making it our own. And we knew at some point we wanted to start a family with 2 maybe 3 kids.  But looking back now…I realize how lucky we are that all those things even came together for us! And while I think you earn your life, you make your plans, you do your best and work hard to be able to say that the life you build is your own, that's only part of it.  What I've learned with time and wisdom is yes those things are part of life.  You work for the things you want and make hard choices and do what it takes to get where you want your life to be. BUT only with those things AND if you are oh so lucky, those plans come together.  

Celebrating 10 years of marriage, heck of living life…real adult life…sick parents, sleepless babies, learning to navigate parenting a child with a learning delay, job challenges, and so much more...it all makes you realize just how lucky you are to be able to say you accomplished anything you set out to accomplish.  Hard work, luck but mostly faith that God has the wheel are the ONLY reason we can truly say we have accomplished our goals.  We can say we are healthy and happy. We can say we have made that house our own.  We have 3 beautiful kids that call us Mom and Dad who are healthy and happy and make us laugh every single day.  Don't get me wrong.  We have worked.  We have poured blood sweat and tears into our tiny starter house…we've stretched its limits.  We've made it grow with us instead of moving out.  I'm still not sure which is easier…moving or remodeling..both have many challenges.  Many months of pregnancy and 3 major c-sections later we have our babies. We've spent days and weeks apart while Jeremy worked hard for promotions and paychecks at his job. So we have worked.  We've sacrificed for our goals.  Heck we are still learning to do all of these things.  But before we even started this journey God set us up for success.  Because any number of our beautiful successes could have been just the opposite despite our plans and work and sacrifice.  So 10 years later I know we are lucky, quite honestly we aren't just lucky…we are more simply, flat out blessed!!

I wish I had asked my 22 year old self what life would look like.  I bet I would say some of the same things.  But I also bet I would have guessed we would have maybe traveled abroad, bought a bigger house and done a few other things we didn't quite get to. I doubt I would have thought about burying a Jer's Dad at 57. Or having a son who couldn't talk till we got him therapy. Or how I would one day quit my job to stay home and how exciting AND truly scary that has been.  I wouldn't have imagined that sunset Jeremy and I would spend in Gulf Shores. Or sitting on the beach in the Dominican next to this best friend of mine knowing at that moment there was no where else in the world I'd rather be. I also I wouldn't have imagined the 3 boys I was going to be blessed with.  Or moments like grasping our babies fingers moments after they were born…or looking into their eyes and seeing their Daddy looking back at me.  Or our first holidays with each of them.  Seeing them learn to walk, talk or eat something they truly love.  Or living room dance parties to music from Wreck in Ralph.  First days of school.  Homemade crafts. How good it would feel to graduate with my bachelors degree…finally!  Or that first date after we had Owen and we realized how different life was after a baby.  Or late nights, turned early mornings out with best friends making memories we know we'll never forget.  Or just simply living life watching so many of our goals, dreams and plans come to fruition.  I couldn't have seen them because they hadn't happened yet.  But…all these beautiful things were going to happen and so much more that I can barely begin to list here.  Things I knew would be part of it but couldn't see them just yet.  But like I said before…10 years of life together teaches you things.  It makes you appreciate things. The good?  It's so good.  Better than what you imagine it to be.  And the bad?  It's definitely hard.  Harder than you imagine. The journey is long and short all at the same time.  But our journey has been filled with so much amazing goodness…and the past 10 years have taught me just how precious and precarious life can be. We can plan all we want.  But we aren't promised tomorrow.

We aren't guaranteed a do-over.  We get one big beautiful messy life.  And that's it!  So here I sit 10 years later so very thankful for hitting this milestone.  For experiencing all the amazing and messy parts of life with the same partner by my side 10 years later.  Knowing that I hope like hell we have 30 more to celebrate.  That I hope I get to sit down and look back at the next 10 years and take stock just like I am now.  Because if this is what 10 years later looks like…I hope the next 10 are half as good to us:

I went back over all my blog posts about our anniversaries…and found still to this day….this blog that I wrote about 4 years ago is still my favorite.  It captures for me…everything I love about our life.  Everything about why our marriage has worked for 10 years and I why I feel like we will stand the test of time.  We're gonna make it for the long haul.  Not because we are different than every other couple out there.  Or because we have something special others don't. Though some may argue we do.  But because there is a true love and respect for each other and a willingness to keep working at it and honestly just have fun.  10 years later we can date like we did when we were 22, only it's even better because we aren't 22 and have so much richness to talk and laugh about that we didn't have before.   So not only do I have a handsome husband to enjoy the romantic side of life with…I have a friend. The best. One who makes me the most angry I've ever been.  One who challenges me.  One who makes me laugh like no one else. And one who has been by my side through good and bad and still wants to be my friend, my companion and my partner in crime.  Happy 10 Year anniversary babe.  What a ride it's been so far. I'm so proud of us.  And just like I was 10 years ago today, I can't wait see where the next ten will take us!  Love you always.